For better or worse men and women are stuck together on this planet until the next dinosaur killer comes or until we drill this mother dry. Nonetheless, each other is all we have and every little bit helps so I intend to do my part and share my thoughts with you.
1st Vice. Living and dying by "rules." Putting restrictions on your search to find happiness is a sure way to come up short. He has to call first, he has to text first, he has to offer to pick me up, he has to open my door...blah z blah. Maybe if you would walk behind him two paces to his left he could open the door with the appropriate hand. But no, you'd rather walk shoulder to shoulder on the wrong side and now he's looking like 'Radio' trying to open that damn door...or possibly that fcking jog we always have to do just before you reach the door so we can open it for you. These so called "rules" you cherish are taken advantage of so much it's hard to tell if it's genuine or not. The guy that might following all these chivalrous rules might be the same one that's chatting, skyping, texting, and smashing four other women. When you're blinded by the rules it's hard to see the red flags. Chill.....just go with the flow.
2nd Vice. Your list or the highway. Besides the requirement of them being physically attractive, most of your "must have" list is probably petty. Some people won't admit this truth, but love does come in all shapes & sizes. On one hand I don't really approve of ALL shapes & sizes but, hey, different boats for different folks. On the other hand if that man has everything you want on the inside, there's always room for improvement on the outside. The wheel wasn't perfect the first time it was made and the iPhone took four versions before it could officially be the best phone on the market. (Yes my thirst for the iPhone 4S is strong) Give a brother a chance...he can always get in shape, upgrade his wardrobe, and mature. Be flexible, no pun intended.
3rd Vice. Being a bitter jerk. Let's face it, if you were so perfect then you'd still be in a relationship.....right?(maybe) Anyway, the sins of your ex are not the faults of the next. Give him the opportunity to mess up on his own before you're showing off your horns and pitch fork. Whatever he may have done wrong should make you more aware not more of an accuser.
4th Vice. Ignoring the obvious. Speaking of being aware....you go into something knowing that he will not be good for you, yet you do it anyway. You knew he was a womanizer, player or dog when you started and then you act surprised when you catch him sexting or cheating. Tsk tsk tsk shame on you, dummy. Everyone letting you know something adverse about the guy you're talking to is not being a hater, they probably care about and thought you were worth looking out for. First, don't ask questions you already know the answer to. 2nd, you weren't apart of that man's past and you damn sure can't be everywhere he goes so some clues and warnings from a friend or associate will only do some good for your ignorance.
5th Vice. Feeding off your pain. It is impossible to ignore or forget the experiences we had to endure throughout our childhood. Regardless if your father was there or not we can all comprehend and recognize the difference between good and bad, right and wrong. Forgive him for his short comings and never look back. Forgiveness is for you, for your peace of mind and no one else. Feeding off of the pain imprinted in your memory causes you to repetitively choose partners that don't consistently contribute to your happiness. Yearn for the joy and love that is unfamiliar to you instead of the settling for the inconsistency of lust.
I have a two year old princess that I plan to teach, mold and instill a shit load of values and knowledge into. I know the affects my presence and absence can do to her mentality, therefore I have to man up. I love my grandmother, my mother, my sisters, my plethora of aunts, and umpteen female friends so I'm not just trying to poke at you, I actually want the best for every queen that reads this. Send me a message if you want a hug. Wait, that sounds like I'm prostituting myself. Disregard lol