Monday, February 27, 2012

For a Good Laugh: Y U NO...

Some of them are just ones I found through a search. 
The originator of this joke actually has a site: Y U No Comic

Friday, February 24, 2012

Racism Only Bothers Me When I'm Shopping

*SPOILER ALERT* I'm Black. Shocker right...because I speak so fcuking eloquently nshit but, it's true I won't deny it. There's no reason to deny it. I'm Black and I'm proud. Black is beautiful. Blacker the berry....blah blah blah. Anyway, regardless of how we feel as a society I personally don't feel that "racism" will ever truly die away, sort of like roaches. When I speak of racism I'm not talking about just Black vs White I'm talking about racism against each others culture/upbringing across the board. 

I don't get offended easily...if you do that's you're own problem, and won't be finding any tips in this post. I've been called a Nigger, Nigga, Black Ass, Monkey, Your People, and maybe one other thing that I can't think of but I just laugh it off because they're usually being petty (cause I'm probably Swaggin on em) and it's funny to me. It's especially funny when someone is trying to insult you and instead of getting upset you have a burst of laughter, the look on their face is priceless. 

So I walk into the liquor store today...Chuck Taylors, Black V-Neck, Khakis, and Black Hoodie. LET ME JUST SAY...the only reason I had on the hoodie is because it's been raining all day. It started to sprinkle as I'm parking so I put my hood on my head. I can't take the risk of looking like Rihanna and walking in the store with an umbrella, that's not gangsta. Now I don't know how much this particular store is used to people stealing from them nor am aware of the ratio of thieves that actually steal things in a pair Old Navy Khakis but damn yo can a brother breath?! I'm not one of those Black guys that overreact to a simple question "can I help you" but MUST you follow me up and down the aisle just because I don't take my hood off and I don't know exactly what I'm looking for.

The store is only 3 aisles wide. Three employees of Indian/Middle Eastern/Southwest Asian decent. ONE entrance and ONE exit. No bullshit...when I walk in the store there were already 6 people in this little ass store. I walk in and immediately after me walks in a Black woman (with a big ass purse) and a White man (with a fcuking trench coat on) and I'M the one you're worried about?! The miniatures are behind the counter, none of these fcuking bottles are fitting in my small as hoodie and KHAKIS without you noticing bro. But I'm pretty sure that lady scooped an extra couple pints of Crown Royal in her purse and that man has put a pint of Maker's Mark in his right breast pocket while my unsuspecting Black ass is distracting you.

I could barely understand any of them on three occasions but I didn't ignorantly yell out "Speak up, speak English this is America!" I used some common sense by filling in the words or I just ignored them altogether. I didn't ask what tribe they were in "Red Dot or Feather." I save that shit for Xbox Live when I'm kicking ass.

There's nothing wrong with being alert but, as an employee of any retail or hospitality establishment it's extremely disrespectful, distracting, and unnecessary to be racial while a customer is shopping or requesting service/assistance. You could lose out on business if someone is uncomfortable or offended. Even worse, that loss of profit could be accompanied with theft from another area that you didn't think was important enough to pay attention too. Keep it light. We ALL deal with racism on a daily basis, nobody needs that shit while we're wasting our money on alcohol & clothes.

In Honor of Black History Month...

Rihanna and Breezy...What The Fcuk Are Y'all Doing?

Personally, I'm not against CB and Ri Ri getting back together. Yes, we know he beat her ass and honestly whether she deserved it is still up for debate since we were never told the whole truth. She's forgiven him and they're trying to move on but as Superstars and Icons for Gen Y...I just don't see a 2nd chance relationship going in their favor. Love is some powerful shit. Love is definitely some powerful shit when you sprinkle Pacquiao punches with it. It's evident that they love each other...also each other's cake...and they MIGHT be great together again but they no longer have the luxury of a "leap & love" lifestyle such as us common folk do. CB and Ri Ri's lives are about profit first and everything else they rank in importance as they please.

Robyn, yousa slick little beach. Taking that dope ass song which was originally only 1:36 long (mad as fcuk about that) and trying to soften up your fans to the idea of you and Mr Chris Bruiser being an item again. I haven't forgotten about her doing all those interviews with the Crocodile tears in those stupid ass Turtlenecks so I doubt your die hard tween fans have forgotten either. Good luck girl, witcho sexy ass.

Christopher, something is wrong with you, seriously dude. You're thee most volatile male I've ever seen in my life. Tweets consistently off the chain. You throw furniture through windows when someone asks you a question. And did I mention your tweets are consistently OFF THE CHAIN. Oh, and there's the matter of you beating up your ex-girlfriend. Breezy, dude, you have a girlfriend now. She's very cute by the way and I'm sure she know a little Kung Fu that's why she's survived this long but frankly the lyrics in your verse of the Cake Remix were very disrespectful to her because bottom line, Rihanna is your EX so it will always be a bad call to spend quality time with her, borrow tampons from her, and make sexually provocative songs with her even if it is "just business."

If you are having thoughts of getting back together I hope you two have thought this venture ALL the way through. And if your intentions was to mind fcuk the public and still make great records...well shit...mission accomplished. I still think that photo is Photoshop though.

Chris Brown's 'Turn Up The Music Remix' was weak to me.

Rihanna's 'Cake Remix' had my ears at full attention though. Take a listen if you haven't heard it.
Cake Remix - Rihanna Feat Chris Brown

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

DC's Singles Mingle

March 25, 2012 5pm - 1am Hosted By:
Big Tigger

DJ Quicksilva

Whether you are actively looking or patiently waiting for the right person to sit down in front of you...SPEED DATING could definitely be the place to find that person. If you don't get an official date out of it at least you'll get plenty of practice right.....RIGHT?!

Visit the link for more info

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

3 Reasons Guys Should Like Valentine's Day Dammit *Sam Jackson's Voice*

Ah....the calendar day of LOVE. The day where you get a pass on Sexual Harassment in the workplace because we're supposed to show affection. Honestly, I've come to the realization that I might actually like this Holiday. Go ahead you can call me weird but my opinion will probably stay the same...and here's why!

1) FREE HUGS. If you don't appreciate a good hug from an attractive woman, a flirtatious cougar, a girl with nice boobs and an okay face, or even the crush you've been dying to break the ice with...than you need to step into my office so we can reevaluate this over zealous sad fucking life you're living. Oh and, real quick, all those women probably WANT a hug from you too. Don't you like giving women The D, I mean what they want, bro!?


3) COMPETITION. There's absolutely nothing I enjoy more than seeing the look of adoration on my Valentine's face when I make her day--A happy pussy usually results in a happy penis. Also, I get equal enjoyment from others expressions of envy. When your gift is on point that usually means 3-5 women are mad as hell that you weren't their Valentine which means there are 3-5 men that wanna kick your ass for showing them up. So THAT means you just shit on 6-10 people at one time, how cool is that?!

On February 14th...I'm happier by making more people jealous. I may not like what the implicates, that if you DON'T do anything for your girl or guy than you DON'T care, that's not fair because it definitely should be done way more. But I play the should too.