Friday, January 13, 2012

Raise Your Hand If You Can Read Minds!

  Besides a few Superheros and Sookie Stackhouse....oh, and myself of course, I haven't heard or read anywhere concerning any human being born with the ability to read minds. Have any of you? No, ok then I'll continue....there are more than 6,000 spoken languages in the World. There's also sign language because obviously deaf people can't read minds either. So why do you expect anyone to read YOUR mind?
  Regardless if a person speaks your language, known you their entire life, gave birth to you or have been dating you for years, they have never nor will they ever have the ability to read your mind. Silence, it won't get you far in this life. Have you ever heard of a mime pulling down a six figure salary? Nope. Do you think Harry Potter would've survived seven books if he never cast any spells? Nope. Or do you think the 911 operator will know what assistance you need if you call and don't say a damn thing? Not a chance. I find it highly irrational and unproductive that people constantly have this "mind reading" expectation from the people that care about them.
  As a child you do not have the right to lash out or be disrespectful to your parents because they don't understand you, they don't know the type of music you like or the clothes you prefer. There's a simple and effective way to change that....TELL THEM. There are a few expressions that suggest that speaking is more beneficial than silence: "Closed mouths don't get fed." "There's no such thing as a stupid question." and my personal favorite "say something, stupid." A healthy relationship with your parents is so so so important. The difference it makes in your life is really hard for me to compare to anything at the moment. I'm overwhelmed at the moment because in most of my young adult life I didn't have a close relationship with my parents (not for the reason of this topic) and now that I do, it feels so much better. But if it's truly your own fault that you don't have a close relationship with your parents because you have this make believe assumption that you can't open up to them...you need to wake the fck up an fix that. Because if you're ever in a situation when they are the only ones who can help you, and you've been rotten to them, you have no one but yourself to blame if they decide to show you some "tough love."
  As a significant other, and we all know that women are the habitual offenders, it is extremely frustrating that you torment your conscience and unjustly ridicule your partner for not having the ability to read between the lines. I really want you to understand what I'm I'm about to explain so I'll break the phrase down. Read.......between.......the lines. The "between" portion of that phrase is ONLY for improvisation. It's a bonus, not a requirement. If you're constantly fighting with your partner because you said you were "fine" but you really weren't, then it's your fault, not theirs. You're not a year old anymore, no one should have to guess what you're trying to say unless you're playing charades. You need to get your shit together and grow up, say what you mean and mean what you say....then maybe you can keep a relationship for longer than a school year...without taking breaks.
  P.S. If you really really want a mind reader as a boyfriend...I'm single and ready to mingle. Text me (LADIES ONLY).

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